“And the King will answer them, ‘Truly, I say to you, as you did it to one of the least of these My brethren, you did it to Me.’”
Matthew 25:40
I am on the way to St. Stephen’s Summer Camp again this week. The Prayer Team will continue, as it does whether I am in town or not. Our theme for summer camp is “God is Love,” which is why I’m choosing to write on this subject throughout the summer. Please pray for me, for our staff and most especially for the teenagers who will be part of this program. May we keep them safe, help them strengthen their relationship with the Lord, and help them to have fun and make memories. It is a privilege to direct a session of this program. It is also a burden. Perhaps the greatest challenge is to convince them of God’s love and inspire them to love Him and to serve one another. I will be praying for you from South Carolina this coming week. Thank you for your prayers!
Many people, including me, participate in continuing education programs related to careers. For some companies, these programs are held in exotic locations. For some people these programs are things they look forward to, and for others it is just another box to check off. Some people enjoy the educational opportunities and some people enjoy the social ones. I’ve flown many times with people who are returning from various conferences, and in striking up conversation with them, I’ve heard everything from “I learned some cool things” to “well, if you are priest, I might need confession.” Today’s reflection is not an indictment on anyone, just something to provoke thought and help us all to be better and more thoughtful in the things we are doing.
A man who is about my age has pancreatic cancer. This kind of cancer is very serious, and his case has some very rare complications which make it even more scary. He mentioned to me in a recent conversation that the rare anomalies of his case are being studied at “some conference” by doctors and researchers to see if there is anything that can be done for his very rare case. His life might be dependent on something that happens at this conference. I won’t say exactly the comment that he made, except to say, “I hope they are actually taking this conference seriously, and not emphasizing the social aspects, because my life is hanging in the balance.”
Our conversation got me thinking. Again, this is not an indictment of doctors or conferences (I try to not be indicting or judgmental with Prayer Team reflections, though occasionally I’m sure I fail), but it made me think of the phrase “it matters to someone.” For doctors at a conference, studying the medical records of someone in Tampa, who they most likely will never meet, there isn’t the personal connection or incentive. This man is just a number on a screen. Yet, what they do, or don’t do, will have a big impact on his life.
There is a vicious cycle in the world of anxiety, depression, low self-esteem, self-loathing and self-destructive behaviors. Many people walk through life feeling invisible. It has almost a whirlpool like effect on people. Once one gets sucked in, it is hard to get out, things speed up and potentially the bottom falls out. Some of us are caught in it right now. We pray that someone will throw us a lifeline, something to grab onto. Some of us might feel like we’ll never get out of it.
And the truth is, little things matter. Little things can have a big effect on perpetuating this cycle, or even reversing it. I go to the bank across the street from my church a couple of times a month. I know the names of the bank personnel—Alex, Kevin, Stelle, Ace. Sometimes when I go, there is a long line, people are irritable, they just want to do their business and leave. Sometimes people are not so nice to the tellers or the bank officers. I’m sure for many people, the bank teller is just a nameless, faceless person who we rely on to get our deposits and withdrawals correct. But there is a story behind each name, and feelings behind each face. A wise person I lean on as a mentor told me to always call someone by name when you are in a customer service situation. So that the person working with you knows they aren’t nameless or faceless or invisible. Using someone’s name, being polite and kind, it helps someone know they are not invisible, that they matter.
And it doesn’t matter if you are the bank customer or the bank teller, if you are the patient who is scared or the doctor who potentially holds the cure in the file of someone he or she doesn’t know. This stuff matters. Little things matter. People matter. And whatever thing we do, no matter how large or small it is, matters to someone. For some people, some attention might help diffuse anxiety, depression and low self-esteem. It might boost self-confidence and foster a sense of self-worth. And for some people, like my friend who is very sick, attention to detail might actually save his life, even though working out the details will never know him, nor will they be aware of the outcome. Things matter to people, even if we don’t necessarily know them or their situation.
Love is about having our eyes open to every possibility to serve and to help, and that might be an obscure file of an unknown patient being discussed at a conference we’d rather not be at. Yes, there is a lot of life that doesn’t really matter—in the big span of things it doesn’t matter if my favorite sports team wins or loses. But there are a lot of things that really do matter, and many of them involve people whose names we will never know or the totality of whose circumstances we are unaware of. However, our action or inaction can have major consequences, which is why when dealing with other people, we have to remember that many things really do matter.
Lord, You know everything. You know the heart and the need of each person. You know who is anxious, sad, lonely, and invisible. Sometimes You deliberately send people into our paths, and other times, Your permissive will creates unexpected encounters. Help us to have eyes that are open to the people in our paths. Help us to have eyes that choose to see and hearts that choose to help, even those that we do not know by name, or circumstance. Help us to remember that what we do matters, and inspire us so that the well-being of others always matters to us. Amen.
Tell yourself, as you choose to be focused or checked out, whether you choose to greet someone by name or complain to them, what we do really matters to someone. Plenty of things matter to us, and we recognize when we miss out on something that matters. Let us offer others this same courtesy. What we do, or what we fail to do, for others really matters. And one important attribute of love is to remember things that matter to others, even if they don’t matter to us.
